Mother Dolphin and the Ocean of Tears

 

In terrible emotional pain, I went to my spirit guides, the Council of Elderwomen. I was sobbing. The Elderwomen said kindly, “There is pain in life, sometimes. It's unavoidable.”

“I cannot stand this,” I said, “and I cannot believe that whoever or whatever created life and the world could want me or anyone to be in such pain.”

“There are cycles in life. Now you are in pain, but someday you will feel better. It will not always be like this,” said the Council.

“You don’t understand,” I sobbed, “this pain is immense and endless. In some ways, I have always felt like this, even though I was putting on a cheery face and focusing on the bright side of things. I cannot stand it anymore!” I realized that this pain is what Buddhism calls the fundamental darkness, the negativity of the universe that stands in the way of one’s happiness.

I called out for any guide who could help me. Mother Dolphin appeared. She is my kindest guide, always loving. She looked at me with deep compassion and acceptance.

Mother Dolphin took me swimming in the ocean. The pain only seemed to increase.

“Drown me,” I begged. “I cannot stand this pain any longer.” I began to weep even more. I said, “Can’t you see this pain is endless? My tears can fill this whole ocean.”

“Please show me!” said Mother Dolphin. My tears filled the ocean and I had plenty left over. “My tears could fill the sky.”

“Go ahead, fill the sky,” said Mother Dolphin. My tears filled the sky and created all the rain.

The Council of Elderwomen was there. “You are so creative! Your tears are creating all the waters of the world – the seas, the rivers, the lakes, the rain!”

This made me feel worse and cry more. “But I don’t want to create that way! Once in a while creating from pain is okay, but not this much!”

My tears would not stop flowing. “My tears could fill all the earths and skies and all the space where water needs to go in every part of the universe.”

“Please do so!” said Mother Dolphin. My tears filled every part of the universe where water needs to go.

Finally, it felt as though I had cried enough. Somehow I had tapped into the universal source of pain, much greater than my personal pain. I know that by realizing how enormous the pain was and going to the end of it, I had completed a cycle, not only for myself but as a balance of energy in the universe for all the places that needed the energy I had been holding in the tears. It was far beyond me as a human having emotions, but about energy. Some places could use the energy inherent in the tears; they needed them as a medicine as they had been poison to me.  Like oxygen and carbon dioxide: humans breathe oxygen and give off carbon dioxide and plants do the opposite, so we are all in balance. It was important that the enormous energy I had in the tears be fully recognized and recycled back into the universe.

I felt calmer, and the pain was gone finally.


Joan Forest Mage is honored to serve as a shamanic artist, teacher and healer in her hometown of Chicago, where she is founder and Executive Director of Life Force Arts Center.